So today....

POSTED ON: Thursday, March 31, 2011 @ 6:53 AM | 0 comments

Today didn't start off as well as I would have liked. I didn't get up until 6:10 which sucked because I didnt have time to exercise and shower. So I just showered and now im at work. I did however pack my eatables for work/class. I brought.
- some peach oatmeal (2 packs @ 120cals per)
- poppyseed bagel thins (2 @ 110cals per)
- sweet jerkin pickles (3oz at about 30cals per oz)

I did however do something that I hated doing. When I went to the library to get my water for my oatmeal I bought a banana and a coffee. I figure the coffee will keep me up however I needed to down at least two bottles of water while drinking it because yesterday my eye started jumping and I then realized I had 4 cups of coffee and no water I had to force down 3-4 bottles of water to attempt to clear some of the caffiene out of my system but this morning my eye was still feeling a little funny so im going to make sure to not do the same thing again today. will update again later.....

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FLASHBACK! Desparate Deflower

POSTED ON: Wednesday, March 30, 2011 @ 8:27 PM | 0 comments

Quickly I supplied you
with me
and told you to
be ready.
To unwrap
and to begin
unfolding
all of your desires
holdings.

Prepared in seams of
hued lace
we were
relentless.
In initiating the want to be
disgraced
by our own
innocence.

Validating
actions first lead
by
false need.
Equipped with intelligence
yet still surrendering
to our flesh
at
light speed.

We
embellished in desires
originally released
by want.
And
drowned in thirst as
passion decreased
by life's
inept taunts.

We
fell for what was
devoid
of truth.
Arrested in the moment
we didn't see the
expressing of a
rushed
youth.

Soon
curiosity was company
no more
but guilt
lingered
long.
As regret bade welcome
and whispered
that it
was our destiny
all along….

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Love, and other drugs...

POSTED ON: @ 8:09 PM | 0 comments

I love that title. I honestly believe...that love is like crack. It erases our "common sense" and injects a sort of dramatic element. There are so many dead beat knight and shining armor's out there. No job, no goals, no money, no respect, neglect, love...hate, love...fight fight fight. I now understand what people mean by, love is for the fearless. The harder we love the harder we think we have to fight to prove that love..... but real love doesn't have to be proven. We make excuses and become so predictable as to find any reason no matter how small...valid or not to invalidate what makes sense because the truth isnt what we want it to be. But dont ever think that I still wont be a real friend. I am going to say what's on my mind whether you like it or not. That's just how I am. I dont sugarcoat anything because I dont want it sugarcoated for me. Knowing the truth will hurt my feelings momentarily but living a lie makes me vulnerable on so many levels. I respect a woman that's truthful about her and hers. period. I know one too. Has no problem saying yep...he hit me but it's ok now. There is no shame in her game although he doesn't have a job, beats her, cheats, lies, steals, and those are his best qualities. On a good day he's an ass. But I respect her because she doesn't lie and has no problem telling you her truth as if she wears it on her sleeve. She dont hide behind societal politics. What her friends think a man should be. She tells the truth. I honestly wish she would respect herself as much as I respect her. Her story would be much different.

Sometimes I dont think that we understand that our stories weren't meant to flow smoothly. Life nor love is beautiful without it's scratches and bumps and bruises but damn....you bruised up. What's scary is that women tend to allow one man to bruise them so much that they take those bruises into the next relationship and allow them to restrict it. God may just be pulling and tugging to get that entity away from us and we are just pulling and tugging to keep it there...... God is a mighty God.

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Sumn

POSTED ON: @ 7:44 PM | 0 comments

Today I started out eating well. But..... it didn't end that well. So what had happened was....
- breakfast was egg whites and turkey sausage
- water
- lunch was chicken nuggets, green beans and mixed fruit
- dinner was shortbread cookies, pepperoni slices, and some water...... and it is 10:25 right now and im hungry...again. I did get up at 5:10, laid back down and got up at 6:10 did turbofire hiit 30, stretch 10.

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Woe is you...

POSTED ON: @ 6:53 PM | 0 comments

It's funny how life always seems to throw boulders in a seemingly clear pathway as if it expects you to not walk around them. Hindsight is really 20/20 because all of the problems that I have had.....at the time seemed pretty big but after the drama was over it paled in comparison to other people's problems. However what makes me point that out is that we spend so much time complaining and saying woe is me....woe is me that we fail to realize that we are blessed way more than not. We have so much to be thankful for yet we complain about the silliest things and allow them to rub our souls with bitter...sorry for venting about this but.....yeah. ok.

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Chop the head, use the shoulders and ears...

POSTED ON: Tuesday, March 29, 2011 @ 5:53 PM | 0 comments

I wonder about relationships. I see/hear some things that make me want run away from being in one. I have a few friends now, two of which have asked me to be more but I said no both times. NOT because I dont want to be in a relationship with them but because all I see is d.r.a.m.a. and love is for the fearless and hooooney...i got some fears.

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So Selfish

POSTED ON: Monday, March 28, 2011 @ 8:50 AM | 0 comments

It's ok to be selfish with yourself sometimes. Try spending one month loving yourself too much and see what happens. :)

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New Ventures

POSTED ON: Sunday, March 27, 2011 @ 12:55 PM | 0 comments

I think that I am about to start doing some online work for money. Some survey sites, PTC sites or online marketing. It wont get me rich but I waste at least 2 hours a day doing nothing I'd rather spend about an hour of that to make 20-80 extra bucks a month. It's not a lot of money but it's more than nothing.

Also, there are like 5 people in my life that are on this whole health kick thing. So my health series will be starting back up. I think that I will be blogging a lot because it may take my mind off of food or sweets. I will record what I eat as well as what I do for exercise. I will try to do it daily but I dont' always have the time to sneeze nor blog. I guess that means it's just time to add a 25th hour to the day..huh :)

Another thing that will be coming will be my music reviews. I will do some popular artists but I really find myself liking artists that are either trying to get on or artists that have had their shot but didn't do as well..... I dont know why. But my first album review will be the mixtape by Jhene. Dondria will be next.
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